The Yellow Sweater

yellow sweater
I stepped off the train in my yellow sweater
careful to step lightly, my eyes blinded by your smile
I looked away
Illuminated into life under a summer’s sun
your eye’s glance caught the reflection of my stare
You looked away
I turned again to test my imagination
did your eyes bore into mine?
I stepped away
I walked briskly, daring myself not to turn, 
to look back and perhaps see you not looking back
I slipped away
The paper ad said looking for the girl in the yellow sweater
its pages laughing at my cowardice
I tossed it away
A week later it said, meet me at the tracks
the ink said, you know where and what to wear
I turned away
Staring through the window into and past the neighbor’s house
I wondered could it be me he asks about
I laughed it away
The love affair haunts me
desire so deep; it is me
My head shakes it away
He comes to me full of potential each day
My mind smiles for me, what could have been
I turn away
The sweater’s bright yellow is dull with age
I pray his heart does not see it is faded
I want to stay
Staring through the window across the street
I wondered if it is ever me he smiles about
I run away
His gentle way of piercing my heart consoles
The lure of the flame and the sting of regret
I slip away
No remedy found I take my leave each day
Not knowing if love will return to tease me tomorrow
I fade away

About Caro

I am a social worker by training and a peace officer by profession having worked with California’s delinquent youth and young adults for 28 years. I firmly believe that our development as humans depends on our environment and that sometimes we get stuck. As such, I write about those things we sometimes ignore or fail to see until we are forced to pay attention.
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